Learning and researching

It occurred to me that I hadn't been very specific when defining the perspective of this blog. My mum was so kind as to point out that my last post had slight religious tone to it and I think it would be strange if it didn't, considering the subject. But she is right, as mums often are. I am a very spiritual woman, but I want to really underline the fact that I have a scientific approach to all aspects of my life. When I indulge in something that really interests me I start a very systematic examination of the subject, reading everything available even the books that only brush over the surface of the matter, the fanatic deeply unprofessional stuff, and the curious investigative materials.

This brings me to the title of this post: Learning and researching.

First came the foundation. Then came the stories and I found spirituality in the unearthly world of fairy tales. When I turned 13 I confirmed, as is the custom, that I was a Christian in front of a priest and my family but I didn't give much thought to the divine being that I pledged myself to. It was just how our family used to do things. Then came a period of my life where I was very lonely. I took comfort in books and stories, and I almost lived inside a universe which I had created to shield myself from everybody else. My sanctuary was the deep devotion to my studies, and I loved to read and write and examine.

I came to read about witches - not the fantasy related ones, but those mentioned in the history books. It seemed to me that there were a great many similarities that these women and I had in common. Many of them had been lonely outcasts, who still devoted their time to help others through their knowledge of nature's medicine. I have several books on my shelf containing some of that old wisdom, weeds that cure fever, depression, impotence and as for their connection with something older than this Christian God - I felt it too. I was more and more convinced that I did not believe in a god like the one I could read about in the Bible. And what also attracted me was the freedom - the divine is not something that is already defined for you. You have to search your feelings for what you find is moving and spiritual.

So I started researching withes, all the information I could find. Whenever I bump into anything today I read it as well. Just 2 week ago there was an article in a Danish newspaper about a girl who was a witch and I loved how it explained her believes. (http://politiken.dk/kultur/article1000264.ece) (Danish)

My point is that I become a witch through learning and critically studying all texts on the subject, and that is also what makes me so much more certain that this is right for me.

The fairy tale

I am a story teller. It is a gift I suppose and you might have noticed that I tend to get a little poetic when I am writing. Ever since I could grasp the idea of stories I have been deeply fascinated with the phenomenon, but I reckon that my all time favorite genre was fairy tales. There was something about this unearthly world that captured me and there was no doubt in my mind that trolls and fairies existed. Magick was with me already then.
So the question is: What does fairy tales have to do with the new age verison of the witch? How was that evil hiddous creature who cursed beautiful princesses a sprout to my current believes? Actually I was as credulous as anyone my age. The witch was a horryfying and deamon-like evíl who was controlled by greed and malicious pleasure. She was the enemy. But she did have a counterpart, the fairy godmother and commen for them were the ability to use the forces of the world to their own or other's advantage. The power was the tricker for the excitement and the beauty. Mostly the endings were bright and happy and everybody got what they deserved.

I am grown now. I know that the world isn't as black and white as the dear tales make them out to be. I know some of the big religions today (the one I was raised with included) revovles around a male diety. There is no balance between the maskulin and the feminine aspects of human nature. The woman was forgotten. Her power was deamonised. The witch is a rebellious character, she is a woman of unknown origien with unknown powers. The fairy tales are created for children to teach and scare them. The witch reprents a heathen, individualistic woman with a connection with or undstanding of the divine (be it good or bad).

There was a time when humans worshiped mother earth. She was the perfect feminin and she was the carrier of life. This witch, the witch that most children and adults know, is but a shadow of a the beautiful power of women. I almost sound like I want a matriacal society, but no. It is the balance that matters. And when men got rid of the goddess, they tipped the scale. Biblically the witch is a devil-worshipper and historically she is mostly innocent woman and men who became the victim of inquosisiton. It's a lot to begin talking about just now, so I'll probably return to them one at the time.

These are all definitions and words and perceptions. You would think today's witches would have chosen a name of a less chaotic and prejudged character to represent their believes. But the truth is.. the chaos is very suiting. The witches of this generation have taken some very old ways up agian. Like ancient people, and like the native americans, nature and divinity is closely connected in their eyes and if there's anything really chaotic it's nature. The witch is the anicient empowered human. She is mystical and rare and I like the word.

Witch - Heks - Bruja. Those are names of women of magick, whether she is of the fairy tales, of the very distant past or the second I write this last word.

The foundation

So how does it all begin.. how is it that one day you put thoughts into words and believe and suddenly you welcome the realization of what you are?
I call myself a witch and I am still not certain that is what I am although every day the term feels more familiar. How I came to define myself as such is something I will elaborate on in this blog, but it begins, of course, with the foundation.

I have always been fond of nature. Maybe I was never the first to get on my knees in the mud, but the sensation and the design of nature has always drawn me in. There resides such a peace in the sky and the trees. A what comes around goes around acceptance that though the leaves will fall new sprouts will take their place when springtime returns. It's the energetic touch of the sun on your skin and the colours when you dive in the ocean with eyes open. In short, I am a highly attentive person and I use my feelings to observe the world.

The more I feel nature, even if it's just the smell of forests, I feel at peace. It is as if a truth washes over me: that I am connected to world, I am one with all things and they are a part of me. In the light of this realisation you start respecting the beings around you and you love them as you love yourself.

So that was my foundation; a childish open heart.

When I was a child and felt these forces of nature I didn't know about religion. I was baptised a Christian, but I didn't know what God was or even cared. As a kid it is as simple as what you feel. It's not about holy books or even words, but it's a matter of feeling happy or sad. And I was happy when I felt loved and when I gave love, like when I was with my family or friends or when I was alone loving to draw with beautiful colours or tumbling around the garden.

My dad wanted to teach me how to swim, and he reintroduced the element of water to me. To this very day I feel very alive when I am in the water as if I was at home. That isn't so strange considering I had recently spend 9 month in a warm lake inside my mother but I have a relation with water and today I believe that in my past lives I have lived in or by it.

These little recognitions are important. To me they are glimps of my own essence and everyone should aim to know themselves as well as possible. You are stronger and more capable when you know yourself.

And that is my foundation: An open heart, a desire to know myself and the everlasting love and curriosity for life.

What comes next is the exploration of these feelings, and of those who share them. It is a long way from the sensation of magick, to being a witch.

To begin with..

This blog is meant to be about all aspects of spirituality and how I combine this with my everyday life. I want to share my thoughts on religion, reincarnation, divine creatures and how different people can view the world.

I love beginnings and all the anticipation and hopfulness. I really look forward to all the wonderful topics and I hope that people will participate actively in the debate.

I am very interested in all paranormal things and will probably go and explore some magical ways. My motivation for the blog was that it never really was dificult for me to find a blog or a webpage where all sorts of people had a lot of wise answers about the wonders of the world. But they rarely speak of their own experiences. They talk of the target but not much about the road which has lead them there.

I have always been very philosophical and wondered about nature and the divine. I have read a lot the last couple of years, and prepared myself for the road: and now I think I am ready to start walking. So this is my search for some truth.